Under pressure

So my oldest son is starting school soon and this is what I'm dealing with!!!

I'm not an uppity sort of person at all, came from very little, but I think I have done ok for myself. I'm well educated (on my own dollars, well sallie maes really but whatever!) I've been all over the country, and eaten and stayed at some of the best places. I know a good meal from a bad one, and like quality things.

With that said, here's the scoop....his school is in a private gated community, it's a great school, and I'm lucky to have gotten in on short notice. It was my first choice when considering schools, simply for the good reviews. However, I have received the class list and everyone in the class is from either that community, or the neighboring town (which is much more well to do than my little town) except me!

I know I shouldn't feel like it is a competition, but I can't help feel that I just want to be taken as equal, and not feel left out, or that my children will be treated any differently? So I find myself searching this morning for my best clothes (with the least amount of wrinkles) and making sure my kids are dressed, not in their pjs, when we are expecting a visit from his teacher! I took the time to switch out the kids toys to make sure she would only see the best and not the 30 crappy Wendy's kids meals toys the kids are usually throwing around, we'll what's left of them.

I think it really comes down to me wanting to better myself. I've always wanted to be better than my parents, or better than some of my family members, especially the ones that I can't bear to even listen speak!! I always have strived to be my best, and I'm very competitive, so I guess it's natural for me to turn this into a competition? But to tell the truth I really like nice things, they last longer, I get more out of them for my money, I think the uppity people may be on to something? Now if I only had the money to fund this adventure in class. For now ill make do with what I have, and make sure to spend some time taking care of the nice things I have. And the rest with my kids.

That's all for today.